What's Inspiring You These Days?
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Let your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.
Yesterday, was my 57th birthdayβ¦thatβs a little hard to say, not because I feel old, but because it makes me feel a sense of urgency to get on with thingsβ¦all the things that I want to do and achieve. Time is ticking and limited. I always joke and say that I want to live to be 120 and maybe I do. My daughters tell me I wouldnβt have any friends because they all will be dead, but I enjoy people younger than me, so I donβt feel thatβs a problem.
Birthdays have a way of making you reflect, especially as you get older.
Whatβs been on my mind is to truly start to live the life I dream aboutβ¦not just talk about living the life I dream about. I think Iβm headed in the right direction, but itβs time to let go of all the habits that donβt serve me, to live each moment to the fullest, to be fully present. So what does that look like for me. Iβm laughing just a little to myself because I feel a long post coming onβ¦and Iβm going to be totally honest becauseβ¦whatβs the downside. So here we go, and Iβll start with the habits that donβt serve me. I guess by doing this, Iβll feel more accountable for the things I say.
I drink too much wineβ¦this quarantine hasnβt helped. I have also gone back to some really unhealthy eating habits (old thought patterns creeping in), Simply saying that you want to change something isnβt enough. You have to make a definite, no going back, decision to change. I have made a definitive decision to change and hereβs why ~
I do truly enjoy having that first glass of cold white wine in the evening, but after that, I think itβs just become a habit that got worse during a hard time in my life and it simply isnβt good for me. Last night, before dinner, I left the house to take Amos (our new puppy) for a walk. We have a beautiful park by the house and it has a new walking trail. Since the quarantine started, so many people have been out walking, having picnics, and just enjoying the beautiful area. Amos and I have somewhat of a routine as far as our walks, but yesterday, I decided to go just a little further because the weather was so nice, and because Baldy was making dinner for my birthday, so why not? As we were walking, we met other dogs (and their people), noticed the birds and flowers blooming, and a friend from high school stopped to talk to me from her car. As I walked up the driveway at home, I realized just how much I had been enjoying myself. I was gone way longer than I intended to be and when I got home, my family was there and dinner was underway. I had that first cold glass of wine and really enjoyed it. I had another with dinner and then got distracted playing with my grandsons and Amos and just enjoying the evening and being surrounded by the people I love
. Our grandson Hudson was asking me about the noises in the wooded lot next to our house and i wanted to show him how far the woods went and tell him about the owl and the foxes that live there, so we decided to take Amos for another short walk (he was a tired puppy). As the evening ended, I realized that I hadnβt had any more wine, hadnβt even thought about it, and didnβt miss it. After everyone left, Baldy and I sat down to watch The Marvelous Ms. Maisel (I knowβ¦weβre a little late to the game) and I chose not to have another glass of wine. I usually sleep pretty well, but last night, I slept like a baby and woke up at 5:30 feeling full of energy. I think that in life, everything happens for a reason and drinking less has been on my mind for a while. Iβve written about it before, but the realization that I had a great time with my grandsons, slept well, and woke feeling energized, probably all because I had less wine than usual, gave me a new energy and outlook on what it feels like to be fully present. I remember one time that a friend said to meβ¦βwhen you drink too much, you canβt hear your angelsβ. I believe thatβs true. We all have angels present with us all of the time, and I want to hear what mine have to sayβ¦what theyβre whispering in my ear because theyβre guiding me to everything I ever really wanted.
We are only defined by our past choices if we choose to be.
Being able to start over every single morning is probably lifeβs greatest gift. No matter what youβre living, you can choose something different at any time.
My meditation practice is one thing Iβm very proud of and I choose to meditate every single morning, before doing anything else. Through meditation, I have learned to live more consciously, and that starting over in any moment is an option. If you just let life happen, youβre living unconsciously, but that doesnβt have to be the case. Daily meditation has helped me to live in a more conscious way because I know the feeling of self awareness. Thatβs not to say that I donβt slip into old habits and let old thought patterns take over, it is to say that I am able to stop myself more quickly and choose something different. Iβve set a strong intention for my life and I do trust that the Universe will take that intention and show me the right thing to do, if Iβm listening.
I realize that Iβm so extremely blessed, but I still have dreams. I am beyond grateful to have three beautiful, healthy, happy, successful daughters and two amazing grandsons. Iβm grateful that my marriage is better than itβs ever been, that we live in a beautiful home on a tree lined street and things seem idyllic and are in so many ways. Butβ¦itβs not a bad thing to always want moreβ¦wanting more is why we are evolving as humanity! If no one ever wanted more, nothing new would ever be invented and no progress would be made.
Things donβt change overnight, and change rarely ever comes in the ways that you plan and expect. Living more consciously, drinking less and eating in a more healthy way has been a strong intention. Last nightβ¦in beautiful moments with my grandsons, I had a realization that I like to feel alive and aware and sleep well and wake up inspired. It was no accidentβ¦ exactly what I had been asking for came in an unexpected way. I had an experience that gave me the determination to do what I need to do.
Living each moment to the fullest - how many times do we say that and hear that? What does it really mean to truly be present and enjoy. To let go of how we think things should be and be open to enjoying how things areβ¦right now. Thatβs not to say that we shouldnβt plan new experiences and try new things, but itβs also important to be content in the moment. To be self aware and not let old habits and thought patterns control our day to day lives. Itβs easy to be fully present when youβre climbing a mountain, or on a sailing trip or even sitting by the ocean, because youβre out of your comfort zone. The trick is to be present, when youβre sitting at your desk, or making the bed, or eating dinner.
Itβs mindfulness over mindlessness. Thatβs what being fully present is aboutβ¦
Life consists of βeverydayβ experiences. Most of us canβt live lives filled with endless travel and constant exhilarating experiences and I donβt think most people want that. But it is important to make sure that life doesnβt get boring and that you choose to craft your life.
Giving up the freedom to choose and letting life just happen to you will never make you happy.
Follow your curiosity and be open to trying new thingsβ¦like starting a blog, or taking dance lessons, or learning photographyβ¦anything that adds excitement to your life. You never know where your curiosity might lead!
All this is to say that on the second day of my 57th year, I am inspired by the possibilities that lie ahead. I am inspired to take more evening walks in the park, to keep learning and growing and to start over each and every day and sometimes each and every moment and to never ever stop wanting more from life! And yes, to enjoy that first glass of cold wineβ¦really enjoy it!