Girl, get yourself together! But wait, is that even possible?

I have a friend who always seems together. She is able to attend every social event, she is the one who brings a bouquet of flowers or some soup when you’re sick, she’s the one you call when you’ve forgotten most anything because she always has everything on her calendar. She can throw a dinner party for 10 people and on the same day, sit by the pool for an hour and read a magazine, you get the picture. The inside of her closets may be a shipwreck, but she’s the only one that will ever know! Just how does she do it, because we all know that none of us ever has our s**t together all the time.

I wouldn’t call myself in the disaster category as far as being together, but I do tend to make things more complicated than they need to be. Simplifying seems to be part of the secret to “getting yourself together”, and because I’ve had plenty of time to reflect on things as I’ve been convalescing, here are my 10 ways to get yourself together…for good.

Find Your Signature Style

Decide what style you love, what looks good on you and what makes you feel like a million bucks every time you put it on. Fill your closet with those things (think Lauren Hutton or Diane Keaton) and wear them! It may be a particular color scheme or an accessory such as a scarf or statement necklace. Your style should reflect who you say you are and what you care about. It should be a reflection of your personality and should stay as consistent as possible. Some days I tear my whole closet apart trying to find that perfect thing because I’m an impulsive shopper and have too much stuff. It would be so much simpler if my style were more consistent. I can say what my style is…causal, pretty simple, and a little boho. That’s not to say that you can’t mix it up a little, but if you stick to your signature style 80% of the time, life is easier.

 Organize Your Paperwork, Clean Your Linens, and Know How to Cook At Least One Meal

This is pretty self explanatory, but paper (aka mail) can take over your life if you let it, so sift through it daily if possible and organize it into categories that make sense to you. Then, deal with it on a regular basis so it doesn’t pile up.

Clean sheets make you feel good, even important. When your sheets are clean, you feel well cared for. Who cares if you are the one who cleaned them.

You should be able to prepare one meal that is healthy and that you would serve to a friend, even if cooking isn’t your thing.

Get to Know Yourself and Be Clear About Who You Are

If you want to be one of those people who always appear to be together (even on the days when you’re not), you must know who you are and what you stand for. I know it sounds cliché, but I love the quote by Alexander Hamilton that says, “ If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.” Knowing who you are and being able to express it gives you boundaries and makes choices much more clear. Come up with a statement…just for yourself, that sums up your professional and personal interests and goals. This is the person you want to show to the world. When people know who you are and what your boundaries are, chances are they won’t approach you to do something that you’ll have to say no to. However, if they do, you’ll know that it’s just not your thing. Don’t make life harder by doing things that you don’t really care about just because someone asked. Your time is valuable, so spend it wisely.

“If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.”

Drop the Drama!

Who has time for drama and… is creating drama the way you want to spend your time anyway? Be the person who tries to solve issues and come up with new and innovative ideas. Don’t be the person who creates chaos and therefore, lives a life of chaos.

We all know those people who are always upset about something or creating something to be upset about. They don’t seem very together…or very happy.

Talk About Ideas, Not Other People

Gossiping about others and their lives makes you look like you’re not smart enough to have anything else to talk about. If the only connection you have with others is gossip, then it’s not a true connection and sooner rather than later, you will be the one being gossiped about. Being a gossip doesn’t look good on anyone, no matter how cute your outfit is. You will have stronger relationships if you talk about things that matter.

Don’t Become Known As a Hothead

People who have short fuses and get angry easily are just the opposite of strong and tough. They don’t have the self control to keep their cool when things get hard. Anger never makes any situation better, it only fuels the fire and makes things worse. Keep your composure and try to be the person who remains calm even when it isn’t easy. Take a deep breath, thing before you speak and take a time-out if necessary. You’ll always thank yourself later!

Live by Principles, Not Impulses

The definition of a principle is – a fundamental truth or proposition that serves as the foundation for a system of belief or behavior or for a chain of reasoning. Simply put, principles are the guidelines that you use to live by. Principles help you to place value on things in your life such as relationships, caring for yourself, others and your home. If you lived impulsively, you would probably not ever get anything done and your life would become a disaster. You wouldn’t show up for work, eat healthy food, or clean your house. Principles keep you doing those things that you don’t always want to do, but know you should. It’s okay and fun to be impulsive sometimes, just as long as you live by your principles most of the time. Like they say: “Life is short, buy the shoes”!

“Life is short, buy the shoes!”

Compliment Others As Often As Possible

Being willing to compliment others shows that you are confident about yourself. On the days when you’re not feeling so confident, giving someone else a compliment will give you a boost. If you’re not happy with yourself, others can’t be happy with you. It’s a vibe you give off and not necessarily something you say or do. The more you are willing to build others up, the more they will want to build you up. How you feel about yourself is the most important thing. Work on this and your life will change.

A note about my outfit- I really hate when I post something that I can no longer find to link, but that’s exactly what happened with this jumpsuit. If I hadn’t had this darn surgery, then it might not be sold out, but…I did link some others that are very cute as well as bag, great platform sandals and earrings.

Stop Thinking Everyone’s Thinking About You, Because They’re Not

I’ll admit that as a blogger, this one can be hard sometimes. I always panic when something happens and I don’t get a post out (like most of this past week). While it’s true that I need to post consistently to keep my audience, if I miss a day, not many people will notice and they will not stop reading my blog. It’s so easy in the age of social media to have the idea that everyone is thinking about you and evaluating what you do. They really aren’t. For the most part, everyone is thinking about themselves and that is as it should be. This really puts things in perspective. You are important, but then again, so is everyone else.

Simplify, Simplify, Simplify

People who are able to simplify their lives appear to be sophisticated. I’m not talking about selling you shoe collection and moving into a small apartment with no internet. I’m talking about simplifying relationships, creating boundaries, learning to love yourself and putting things into perspective. People who live complicated lives, create drama, get angry, live impulsively and don’t have boundaries. So go out and enjoy this life by being authentic and let other people worry about themselves. That’s what I call finally “Getting Yourself Together”!

Here’s a bonus…

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You Can Shop My Outfit In This Boutique