Lessons Learned in 2020
I’m sure everyone is tired of hearing about how crazy 2020 was…and we’re tired of living the crazy as well! Looking back, there are lessons that I’ve learned and what I’ve realized is that there have been many blessings this year. As 2020 comes to a close, I wanted to reflect on some of what I’ve learned.
We Are Adaptable!
If you had asked me at the beginning of the hear if I could give up travel and going out to dinner and if I could not see my extended family at Thanksgiving and not see my mother at all except through a window…I would have said of course not! If you had told me that I wouldn’t be able to be present for the birth of my grandson in Germany, I would have said you were crazy…If you had told me that Baldy would be home EVERY SINGLE NIGHT, I wouldn’t have believed that possible and my first response would have been…NOOOO! I need at least a couple of nights to myself.
As you know, all of these things did happen…I have survived and I’m fine. I realize that everyone is not fine and I’m very sad and worried for those who are suffering. This post is personal, so please don’t think that I’m being insensitive to anyones hardships.
I have learned that I am very adaptable. Adaptability has been defined as the ability to be creative and flexible in the face of new situations.
Luckily, I work from home, so being home a lot is what I’m used to and I’m sure that helped. I have had very few moments of feeling sorry for myself and have gone on with life as I could. I have actually enjoyed having my husband home and we have gotten along surprisingly well considering that he has traveled for our entire marriage of 30 years. COVID has actually been good for us…If you’ve been reading my blog for any amount of time, you know that we’ve been through some rocky times, so !’m very thrilled that we’ve enjoyed our time together…and it’s not ending anytime soon.
I’ve also learned to TURN OFF THE NEWS. I’ve realized that the news…for the most part, shows the worst of humanity. Yes, there are problems and yes, I do turn on the television long enough to get updates, but I had to learn to leave it at that. Your mind can totally take you out if you’re not controlling what you listen to and talk about. You have power over your thoughts and focusing on the positive is best for everyone. I’m in no way saying that we all shouldn’t do what we can to help those who are in need, but we can’t spend 24/7 worrying about the world crisis.
The small moments are the best moments!
I’ve always loved the quote that says…”Enjoy the little things in life, because one day you’ll wake up and realize they were the big things.’”
It’s so true. The small beautiful day to day moments make up our lives.
I’ve been so fortunate to spend time with my grandsons almost every day…getting to know them in a way that probably would not have happened if life had gone on as usual. I would have been traveling more and busier than ever. That was the plan before COVID.
I was also so fortunate to have my daughter Rebecca home for several months in the spring. She and her fiancé live in Boston and things were much better here at that point. I would not have had that time with her otherwise, and we made fun memories…cooking together, going on dog walks, having intense conversations about things that matter.
One of the most life changing events of 2020 was getting Amos, our beautiful, amazing, Golden Doodle. We have totally fallen in love with him! Puppies need so much attention and love and Amos got that in such a big way. We’ve only left him for 2 nights this whole year and he is part of our family now. I can’t imagine what we would do without him at this point AND we’ve enjoyed having a dog so much that we’re planning to get another one in the spring of 2021.
Having said all of this, I know with all my heart that family is everything and 2020 has been a very healing year for our family.
What small moments do you treasure from 2020?
You Can’t Live Your Life in Fear!
When you choose to live you live your life feeling fearful all of the time, you only create more things to be afraid of…like I said, your mind will take you out if you let it.
Looking back, I’ve become bolder and more confident AND, most importantly (maybe), I’ve learned how to redirect my thoughts when they start to go down the rabbit hole. One of the things that has helped me, and I say this all the time, is my daily meditation. It is very very rare for me to skip a morning meditation. I find it’s the best way to begin my day. Meditation and life visioning have helped me to see the areas in my life I need to work on. I have been able to imagine the “what ifs”, the possibilities for what I can achieve. As a result of this, I’ve become more confident and come to the realization that I can (and will) do anything I imagine I can. How I feel about myself (my self image) dictates what I believe I can do. Certainly, if you don’t believe in yourself and your dreams, they can never come true. You must be able to feel the feelings of living the life you are dreaming of and that’s when it starts to happen. When you make a big decision to start to walk toward your dreams…big things are going to happen.
Gratitude is Everything!
Waking up every single morning and being grateful for this life I have is the only way to start the day. Some days, it’s challenging. Again, it’s your mind…your ego would have you believe that life is hard and things never go the way you want them to, but gratitude turns all of that around. Gratitude and meditation get me centered and ready to deal with the day in front of me in a positive way, no matter what. Of course, there are days when things don’t go so well and I have to regroup and come back to that place of gratitude and normally, that’s enough to turn it around.
Look Forward…Never Backward!
Looking back and living in the past keep you from moving forward. Staying stuck in old thought patterns of blame and negativity is my definition of hell. My relationship with my husband is better than ever now because I realized that if we were going to stay together, I had to completely let go of the past. Certainly, there were lessons learned that made both of us better people and for that I am grateful. Being present in the moment, while at the same time holding a vision of the best that life can be has helped me to be a happier and healthier person.
We’re all a work in progress and the work isn’t always easy, but it’s always worth it. What kind of a life do you want to live? It really has nothing at all to do with outside circumstances. It has only to do with what you believe and if you are willing to do the work it takes to get there.
Part of looking forward for me is taking a day of life visioning…making a vision board and getting really clear on what I want for 2021. I am certain that it will be the best year ever.
I have come to believe in a collective consciousness which is defined as “a constellation of ideas, beliefs, and values that a great number of individuals in a given society share”. I think it’s important that we are part of a collective consciousness that believes that our society is moving forward toward a more peaceful, unified and loving time. The alternative is that we believe things are only going to get worse.
Let's all be part of a movement that believes things are going to get better. If it’s true that holding a vision for what we want in life is the way to get what we want, imagine how much better this world would be if we all held a vision for peace, wellness, inclusivity and equality AND were willing to do the work to make it happen! It all starts with a “WHAT IF’!
What excites you for the new year…what do you want to become in 2021? Please leave a comment and let me know what lessons you’ve learned this year and what you see for the year ahead.