YOU OWE YOURSELF THE LOVE THAT YOU SO FREELY GIVE OTHER PEOPLE!

I’m starting Valentine’s Day early this year because it’s all about spreading love and kindness and we should be doing that everyday…BUT, you can’t really spread love to others if you don’t love yourself.

It seems that everywhere I turn, people are talking about self-love…I have certainly been talking about it more lately, because it’s so important to living a life that is more fulfilling. How you feel about yourself influences your actions in every area of your life. It influences how you choose your friends, the images you project to others and how you deal with problems. I’ve been reading Gabrielle Bernstein’s book, Super Attractor and self-love has come up for me in my meditations and thoughts about the spiritual aspect of who I am. I also have been listening to Louise Hay on YouTube as she recites positive affirmations and have been deeply affected by how some of them make me feel. Through Gabby’s book and listening to Louise Hay, I’m being shown areas in my life that need my attention…or not so much of my attention because the key is having faith in the Universe to guide and letting go. I believe that everyone on the earth was put here for a purpose, but we’ve gotten so disconnected from our inner voice and the infinite wisdom that comes from within and we’ve lost our way.

You might think I’m rambling here, but everything is connected and when you feel connected to a higher power, and when you realize that you have access to it’s guidance, it’s very powerful.

Here are a few ways that you can start to bring more self love into your life.

First of all, what is self-love even? I’m not talking about a love that comes from the ego. I’m talking about a love of self that comes from knowing you are a worthy person. When you realize your individual worth, you can shine your light and be of service to others. Although a new dress and a little botox may help you to present yourself to the world in a more confident way, those things don’t grow self love. When you dress in a way that pleases you and expresses your creativity, you will be the most beautiful!

Self-love is more than simply feeling good, although people who truly love themselves do feel good.. It is a state of appreciation that grows from our actions and success in life. It comes from our willingness to step out of our normal environment and learn something new…it comes through actions that mature us and propel us forward. Self love grows when we begin to accept our strengths and weaknesses and also when we realize that we are humans trying to find personal meaning in life. It comes from resisting the need to explain our shortcomings, and from being content to truly listen to others with our full attention.

Here are a few ways that can help you start to love yourself more:

Start a meditation practice and become more mindful during the day. Meditation can quiet that critical voice that we have of ourselves. When we take the time to find some stillness everyday, it becomes something we can go back to in stressful situations. When you’re mindful, you can put your ego in check and come back to your true nature, which is love. This allows you to choose again and start over in any situation.

Become aware of behavior patterns (habits) that do not serve you. When you can objectively take a look at your life and realize what is keeping you stuck, it becomes easier to change those patterns and self sabotaging behaviors. When you keep repeating the same old patterns that don’t serve you, it makes you feel stuck and mad at yourself. Right now, I’m working on drinking less wine in the evening. When I have 1 glass with dinner (or 2 at the most), instead of 3 or 4, I accomplish more in the evening and set myself up for a better morning. When I get up, meditate, work out and start my day in a healthy way, it makes me feel better about myself…it’s a small success that gives me confidence. I’m being brutally honest here about the wine. I started drinking more wine when I was going through a difficult situation and it became a bad habit that I’m slowly breaking. Last night, I had hot tea instead and slept like a baby.

When you take care of yourself, you automatically love yourself more. Make time to exercise regularly, prepare and eat nourishing foods, get a good night sleep naturally and you’ll begin to feel so much better. You are worthy of extraordinary care! Small steps equal small success which add up to big successes!l

Set healthy boundaries for yourself. Learn to say no when something doesn’t align with your values. Too often, we end up doing what others think we should, which takes away from time that is critical for personal development. Schedule time for yourself that is non negotiable.

Take a look at the people you surround yourself with. Do they celebrate your successes and want to see you live a happy and fulfilled life? If not, it’s probably time to rethink your friendships. Life is too short to waste with people that don’t feel good to be around. Surround yourself with people that inspire you and be the person that can in turn, inspire! Give that which you wish to receive.

Stop being so hard on yourself! Realize that you have the ability to “choose again” in every situation. We’re all human and our egos take over at times, causing us to make bad decisions, but you can always start over. When you never fail, you never learn. Until you accept your own shortcomings, you will not be able to love yourself. You learn and grow from your mistakes, so immediately forgive yourself, see what can be learned from the situation and move on. Living in the past keeps you from success.

What do you stand for? Living a life based on love instead of fear will help you to accept yourself and those around you. When you live a life with purpose and clear goals, it is easier to let go of outcomes and trust that the Universe will guide you toward what you want or something even better.. Set your intentions every morning and every evening before going to bed and make your decisions based on those intentions. When you accomplish what you set out to do, knowing that guidance is always available, you will love yourself more.

It is true that you get what you think you deserve in life and also that you cannot love others well if you don’t love yourself. Self love comes from within. It’s really where all the answers lie. I encourage you to start a meditation practice and listen everyday to your inner voice and not your ego talking. Your ego will tell you that you’re not good enough, that you failed and that you can’t accomplish what you want to. Your intuition or your inner voice will tell you to have faith in your ability to make your dreams come true! You will start to attract people and circumstances that support you in every situation. You will also be an example to others encouraging them to do the same, which starts a never ending cycle of love and encouragement. One person can change the world! When we are truly aligned with our own beautiful and unique spirits, we can authentically give and receive real love.

Please, leave a comment and let me know what you think of this post!